Pinky's Place

"That which does not kill you will only make you stronger."

Friday, April 21, 2006

On an ass-kicking mission...I'm no one's victim!

You know, I thought my stint with crazy people would come to some sort of standstill for a while. Especially since the episode with purple hair lady was enough drama to last for months. But no, the fates have decided that I haven't been exposed to enough. I'm not sure if this was the kind of exposure that I needed though.

Wednesday morning I was on my way to the Bell Centre (scored the last 6 tickets in the blues for game 6!) with plans of studying at the library after. So, I was waiting at my usual bus stop minding my own business, bopping my head to my mp3 player. Into the bus shelter walks a guy, looks like a student from the french cegep down the street. He was talking on his cell and holding his jacket in one hand. Nothing unusual, right? Since I'm sitting on the bench and the bus schedule is posted up behind me, the guy walks past in front of me to get a closer look. Ok, everything is cool. Then I guess he's finished looking at the bus schedule when he starts to walk back out of the shelter. At that very moment I glanced up. And what do I see?

His d*** hanging out of his pants!!

Now what the hell is this all about?! Honestly, I have to say, I am the queen. For the amount of shock that was running through my brain, I don't think it showed on my face. All I could think was,

"Holy sh*t, his dong is hanging out of his pants!! Should I tell him?!"

Then I thought,

"Wait. Is he doing this on purpose? He looks normal...he doesn't seem like he's trying to do some perverted sh*t. Then again....you never know these days. But what if he just went to pee and forgot to put it back in? But who forgets to put it back in?! But if he really doesn't know, that's super embarrassing and someone should tell him."

All these thoughts were zooming in my mind in the span of about 5 seconds. In those 5 seconds, my bus was coming. I had to make a decision. Tell dong man or don't tell him. The bus stops, the door opens. I wait. Does dong man want to get on the bus? That's going to be crazy, he gets on the bus with his business exposed?! In any case, I get on the bus. In the split second I had, I decided to let him be free.

Dong man never gets on the bus.

I have to say, I was shocked/surprised/traumatized/confused about all this. I mean, one minute I'm in my bus stop getting down to some Mary J. Blige and the next minute, I'm eye level with some strange guy's wee wee. Non consensual, I might add. I'm reeling from shock. It's too early in the morning for me to deal with this. I look out the window. I can see that he's crossing the street and looks headed back from whence he came. What? So, why did he come to the bus stop again? To not catch the bus?

I may have thought about it for another few minutes. Then I think the part of my brain that deals with traumatic incidents blocked it out because seriously, I forgot about the whole episode until two days later! I totally and utterly blocked it out of my mind! I only got reminded of it when I heard someone say the word porn. Then I remembered. Dong man!

I ended up telling my mom about this to see what she had to say. Right away, she said,

"He did it on purpose."

Really? I didn't really think so at the time. I was even beginning to argue with my mom - he didn't look like he was doing it on purpose. He wasn't wearing a trenchcoat, he didn't run up to me, fling his jacket open and say "Yeah, baby!". But now that I think about it, if your business was hanging out there, wouldn't you feel it? I mean, it was breezy, so I'm sure it wouldn't feel the same as if it were tucked away safe in your pants, right? And come on, who forgets to put his business away? The equivalent would be if some girl's boob was hanging out, she would definitely know because you can feel the difference. Then I just got angry. He was exposing himself to me on purpose?!! I feel like kicking his ass. WTF?! Thank goodness, I acted like nothing was wrong and didn't give any type of reaction (at least any noticeable reaction). I feel so decieved, like someone was trying to take advantage of me. How dare he!! Well, guess what buddy? Try harder! It'll take more than a floppy little saucisse to make me blush! Sick pervert! I swear, if I see this punk again, I'll give him a good kick in the crotch. He wanted attention to that area - he'll get it alright.

Now I really feel like kicking someone's ass. I pray that no one pisses me off today when I go to the library (no worries, it's just microbiology this time!).

I'm off to the libby... lord save the perverts 'cause
I'm still pissed.

5 Comments:

  • At April 22, 2006 11:03 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Tiffany, you made me laugh. But it is not really funny when you realize how normal some prevert look. be careful

     
  • At April 22, 2006 11:19 a.m., Blogger Taiyou chan said…

    Oh Tiff!! How you said the story sounded really funny! I was laughing all the way, but I know it's traumatizing!
    Something like that happened to me as well, but it was worse... cause he was jerking... and coming toward me!!! I had to pull my kung fu stance on him and throw my big heavy bag at him so that he stops coming. Why do people do that?? gah! Keep your wee wee to yourself!!

     
  • At April 28, 2006 8:18 p.m., Blogger Masta said…

    LOL!!!!

    No effing way was some guy running at you while jerking off AND NO WAY did you throw a bag at him!!!! Was he running head first or crotch first??? I can't believe this!!!

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!

     
  • At April 29, 2006 2:29 p.m., Blogger Michael Choi said…

    Hehe..this is kinda funny...my friend Chris actually commented on your blog...what a coinkydink this is...

     
  • At May 10, 2006 10:04 p.m., Anonymous Cara said…

    My vote, it was on purpose. After having done some research (which involved asking my hubby if he would notice) I have determined that unless heavily sedated (not likely given he was walking around) he was a perv.

    How do these people find you?

     

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